I am in Villiers and am sleeping over at the most beautiful farm, where I have a speaking engagement early in the morning. It is really a privilege to hear the jackals howling in the distance and enjoy the absolute silence. I hear my deepest fears and my heart beats distinctly tonight. Is it maybe the silence that makes everything so much clearer? Sometimes I think we need times like this more often, to be confronted by our fears so that we can lay it once again before the cross. “Jesus, what would I have been if you didn’t die for me and rose for me?”
Aldo writes in his dairy every morning and his faith is growing stronger all the time. “I am going to walk alone again, I am going to preach Jesus’ Word, I am going to teach people faith!” “Mommy, be holy, as Jesus wants you to be, it’s a road of becoming holy!”
I minister in a very small town in Namibia, and I experience in my spirit that there is a division. I can hardly believe it, they are such a small congregation. I ignored what the Holy Spirit wanted to tell me. Back in Windhoek somebody tells me that that small congregation is tearing in two. The reason for the division is that their pastor is handicapped and half of the congregation feel that he is not talking clearly enough. My spirit is in uproar, because you know my child is handicapped. I see him one day proclaiming the word and now I wonder, what if he gets confronted with the same people that the Reverend did. People that stare themselves blind against the flesh and they don’t hear and understand him properly? The world makes a choice for us, first body, then soul and then spirit. God wants first spirit then soul and then body. Even if you and I are physically completely normal, if your spirit is dead, you are actually dead.
God is the only one that can minister life to us!
Have you ever been at a place in your life, that you saw nothing but knew God was speaking to your spirit! Paul knew that his life has changed forever.
Acts 9:3-8 “But in the going it happened! He drew near to Damascus, and suddenly a light from the heaven shone around him. And falling on the earth he heard a voice saying to him, Saul, Saul! Why do you persecute Me? And he said, Sir, who are You? And the Lord said, I am Jesus, whom you persecute; it is hard for you to kick against the goals.
Both trembling and being astonished he said, Lord, what do You desire me to do? And the Lord said to him, Rise up and go into the city, and it will be told you what you must do. But the men traveling with him had been standing speechless, indeed hearing the voice, but seeing no one. And Saul was lifted up from the earth, but his eyes being opened he saw no one. And leading him by the hand they brought him to Damascus.”
He knew that he would never be able again to turn back to his previous life, and that he will proclaim the Good News for the rest of his life. That he will be true to the command that God gave him. Paul did not run to people in unfaithfulness, but he waited on God.
“Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed”
We can miss God’s plan for our life if we walk in impatience. If we do not learn to wait patiently on God, especially in specific areas in our lives, we will cause more problems than good. Patience became such a large part of my life, it gives God a chance to work on my life according to His plan, not mine.
Pray and obey, pray and obey, pray and obey and before we know it, we’ll walk into God’s perfect plan for our lives.
Does Aldo walk yet? According to me, yes.
We have sowed his wheelchair and he helps himself, but according to earthly standards he is not properly walking yet. He walks with help and falls a lot. But, I believe and I know, because Jesus lives. That is why I can send his soccerball to school with his bag everyday. That’s why I say nothing when I see the hump on his head after school. He tells me he was goalkeeper and dived for the ball. “I just forgot I can not walk properly yet”, according to Aldo.
I love you Lord, and I honor you that Aldo will walk and play soccer. Honor to God!
God’s ways are not our ways.
Father you loved the world so much You gave Your only begotten Son to die for our sins so that whoever believes in Him…. Will not perish, but have eternal live. Thank You, Thank You Lord that you are with us now and that You will guide us into eternity!