21 June 2019
Psalm 40:2-3 He has brought me up out of a horrible pit, out of the miry clay and set my feet upon a rock, and established my steps. Hy has put a new song in my mouth.
I look at David’s life and see that he was just a normal man. He went through fire, trials and tribulations just like you and me. And like us, he had difficult days and even faced death.
But something deep within him made him stand! He had an inner source of strength that came out as a song in his heart that could not be silenced by his circumstances. His strength was his intimate love relationship with God.
Deep within us all – are a sound, a song, written on our scrolls by our Abba Father.
When we try to fix things ourselves, our song will be about our own strength, singing about our ways, solutions and plans! It is a song that the world loves and understands. It is the song of me, myself and I.
For years in my life I was at that place. A place called “self."
But the more I died to self, the more spontaneously a different song was birthed within me. "Abba, I am so dependent on You. You are the answer to my every question and as I gaze into Your eyes, I walk on the water. In Your eyes, I see the reflection of the Door, Jesus Christ, the only answer.”
“Yes, Retah, I am the Way, the Truth, the Life – I Am all that you need.”
At times when I become anxious, I also see another door, reflected in His eyes – the one called Hope and I hear Him say, “You have nothing to fear.”
The more I trusted in, leaned on and relied upon Him, the more doors I discovered. There is the door called Faith – which is the substance of our miracles.
By entering the Joy door, I discovered that His joy is my strength and that He wants me to have joy in all circumstances.
There is the precious door called Trust – where I can let go of all control and lean upon Him. And the precious Love door. On entering this door, I hear His voice, “I love it when you are so close to Me and seek Me; stay in Me My child”.
In His presence, His power starts to flow and fills my innermost being. Here I drink and drink from this living waters. As I drink, I can feel my fears and negative words and thoughts being washed away. The more I drink, the more spontaneously my tears flow as He lathers and sooths my heart, bruised emotions and wounds.
“My child, I want you to trade every negative situation, all your pain and the negative results on earth. Trade them in heaven on the sea of glass through the Blood of Jesus.”
I looked up and saw a beautiful door called "God’s goodness". As I opened the door, I looked through the veil of God’s love and for the first time I could see His goodness and purpose in every difficult situation. Here, I truly realized that it is Jesus that sustains me in every dark hour, in every negative outcome, in every painful situation – He carries me.
"I have been longing for you to enter in. I see you being focused on your situation? But, let Me teach you what would happen if you would turn your focus and search out My goodness. If you do this, you will have the ability to look right through your situation and problems and see My heart for you. I Am a good, good Father, who loves My children. Allow me to release heaven’s reality into every area of your life. My Goodness is My nature – unchanging, stable and secure – and I want you to live in this reality of who I am. Knowing My goodness, will enable you to walk through difficult situations and experience heaven’s revelation and power. This will change your life forever.”
As I remained in His presence, I found that the vibration of my song started to change. The very sound coming out of me started to change and with it my reality of fear, doubt, self-pity, worry and control; it all slipped away. My thoughts changed as the way I started to see changed. And oh, the way I prayed changed.
As I looked down, I saw that I was standing on the sea of glass – I have entered through Him and were standing on heaven’s trading floor. Here everything is transparent. I looked through the glass and many beautiful colours shone through. His Light flooded every aspect of my being. In that moment, I looked at my heart and realized – on this floor my heart is completely transparent. Here, there is no pretense – just truth.
I opened my eyes and gazed at the floor of my office – it was just the hard-wooden floor of earth’s reality. As I wiped off my tears, I listened to Holy Spirit’s voice. "Retah, if you stay and pray from the dimension of the earth, then the floor of your heart will stay hard. Make sure that you always stay in Me, completely dependent on Me. Enter in and come up higher, come to the trading floor of My reality, live and move and have your being – yes even that of every reality you face – bring it to Me. Then and then alone will your song not be silenced by your earthly circumstances. You need to release heaven’s song”.
Thank you, Abba, that I can come boldly to the throne of grace to receive mercy and grace. Through the substance of faith my eyes of faith start seeing the bigger picture. And as I stay in Abba Father’s heart – in His presence, I begin to understand His heart for our earthly situations.
Don't give up, let’s run the race of faith.
Retah and family