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Live by faith and not by sight

It was a normal Friday morning; I stopped at the office,sorted out a couple of things and then met with my husband for a quick coffee before leaving for my ministering appointment over the weekend. Tinus decided to drive me to Mesina which is 700km from where we stay. We left, prayed and Imade a few more phone calls. Driving, we experienced His tangible peace. We were both quiet, busy with our own thoughts.

The Friday afternoon traffic on the N1 towards Pietersburg was extremely busy. I put my hand on his leg and said ‘thank you for doing this for me’. The next moment a bakkie (pick up van) came from the opposite direction right towards us. There was no time to do anything. I screamed and saw the car coming right towards us - I thought “head on”! Tinus was alert and managed to swerve to the left and we were hit on the right side of the car. The impact of the accident made our car to spin and eventually come to a stand still against the hill on the side of the highway. The airbags popped and hit me. I came to only as the car stopped.

I became aware of the smell of fire and Tinus next to me.There was blood all over him. He asked me ‘Are you ok? I then saw the smoke and said: ‘we have to get out of the car’. Tinus was unable to move. The right side of the car was severely damaged and dented. I kept on saying – ‘come on Tinus, help me, you have to get out on my side.’ He could not move. In desperation I started to pull and then I saw his arm lying limp on his leg. There was a big open wound with bones sticking out. I kept on trying to pull him out and he urged me not to touch his arm. Eventually we got out. I could see that Tinus was in a lot of pain but I was so thankful that we were alive. I was filled with wonder and thanksgiving that we could speak to each other and the realisation that we would be fine!!!

We waited almost an hour for the ambulance to reach us. I was running around picking up our belongings, all the time seeing flashes of our accident eight years ago. BUT with this one big difference. This time I climbed out of a wreck and faced the situation without any fear of death. This time knowing that I know that my Yeshua my King is alive. Life or death – He is in control of our lives!

Holy Spirit led me to sanctify the blood that was spilled and to break down the altars of death and destruction. I also urged Tinus to pray with me. Dear Abba Father, we choose, right now in the Name of Yeshua, to forgive this man that caused the accident. We bring him before you and ask that You will be with him. Unable to help us at Warmbaths hospital we were transferred to Montana hospital in Pretoria. We arrived there at 17h00. They attended to his wounds in the ambulance and Tinus winced and screamed with pain. Frustrated, I could only watch as they struggled to get the morphine drip into his veins. Their first attempt only managed to get the needle into his flesh and his hand started swelling right before my eyes. Impatiently I spoke to the paramedic knowing how desperately he needed the pain medicine. I heard Tinus saying: “stay calm Retah don’t speak to him in such a manner”. This was like a wakeup call to me. Here Tinus was in so much pain and still his actions and words portrayed the fruits of the spirit even thanking the paramedics for their help and efficiency. I prayed and prayed and kept on repeating - God saved our lives. Our God YHWH is alive – He saved our lives today!! Even in the ambulance I was prompted by Holy Spirit to bind the spirits of death, trauma and shock.

I saw the blood on my clothes and felt pain in my arm but did not give it much notice. Only at the hospital did I become aware of the cut on my arm. They x-rayed my arm and stitched the wound. Because of his severe pain they sedated Tinus to work on his arm. On Saturday morning he was in theatre for 4 hours as they started reconstructive work on his crushed elbow. On Monday morning they will continue with a bone and skin transplant from his hip.

Aldo knew in the spirit Friday afternoon when it happened and was very worried about us. Ma'am Patrys had her hands full only realising why, when I phoned the office to tell them what had happened. I did not want to upset them and said we were fine. Aldo was not convinced and kept on and on that they had to continue praying for us. It was late Friday evening when I came to rest. I went on my knees just wanting to be with my Father. I heard His familiar soft voice “Retah, you are OK, I am with you - through all the trails of life, I AM with you, I love you and I will never leave you –thank you for worshipping Me throughout your trial and test today”. For the first time I cried, I wept releasing all the emotions of the day and I could feel how my beloved Father was comforting me.

“ Oh Father, how we listen to Satan’s lies telling our flesh that we need many earthly things in order to be happy and secure. Telling us that we need acceptance from the world, trying to be perfect in everything we do. No, no - I am dependant on Christ alone!  Father my deepest need is for Your presence. You live in me and I praise You that these challenges crushed out more and more oil for Your Kingdom. Thank You that I know by choosing Christ Jesus instead of the world I store up heavenly treasures.

Mat 6:20 But gather and heap up and store for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust nor worm consume and destroy, and where thieves do not break through and steal;

It is Sunday night, the kids went to see Tinus today, and they feel better now that they could see for themselves that Dad is fine. I am thankful tonight realising once again that our main purpose is to exalt Yeshua in everything. Yes, even in our pain and suffering. All the things of the world will pass. Your body can be in pain, your heart can be in pain, people can hurt you, you can die – but none of that can separate you from the love of Christ. And that is what I testify today. My spirit sings for I know that no longer was I afraid of dying, or persecution – I know from everything we went through this weekend that my Father’s words are true - nothing can ever separate you from My love, Retah.

Php 2:20 For I have no one like him [no one of so kindred at spirit] who will be so genuinely interested in your welfare and devoted to your interests.

I wipe my tears and think of His words in Ps 56: 8 You number and record my wanderings; put my tears into Your bottle--are they not in Your book? Yes, I know that the tears of those who cry out to God are preserved in heaven. The fact of their weeping is also recorded. Lord, please search my heart. I know that I cannot afford anything in my life not to be pleasing unto You. Yes, I am JUST FLESH – BUT I am standing before you tonight, PLEASE SEARCH MY HEART! Once again this is what I have learned. There are several books in heaven where matters concerning the lives of people on earth are written

Rev 20:12 I[also] saw the dead, great and small; they stood before the throne, and books were opened. Then another book was opened, which is [the Book] of Life. And the dead were judged (sentenced) by what they had done [their whole way of feeling and acting, their aims and endeavours] in accordance with what was recorded in the books. Also the book of remembrance for those who fear the Lord and esteem His name.

Mal 3:16 Then those who feared the Lord talked Often one to another; and the Lord listened and Heard it, and a book of remembrance was written Before Him of those who reverenced And worshipfully feared the Lord and who thought On His name.

“Yes Retah,everything in life is written down, even today, every thought of you, every motion  of you, all your pain – all your questions – I have it all written down. But here I am tonight to tell you once again always remember – life is about Me, don’t fight for your own life, but rather lay it down for Me. I am in control of your life!

Psa 31:3 Yes,You are my Rock and my Fortress; therefore for Your name's sake lead me and guide me. :5 Into Your hands I commit my spirit; You have redeemed me, O Lord,the God of truth and faithfulness.

I feel so weak in the flesh, but so strong in my spirit. I lie down and close my eyes; my sore body enjoys the comfort of the warm bed. And through the tears I just praise my King for life, life in abundance – Your Zoelife. No more do I fight for flesh and blood, but for the real life!

Life is beautiful – let’s celebrate life!

Retah and family

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