The baptism of love
Aldo turns 22 this week and it is 10 years since our accident. I look at his face, his brokenness and his overcoming spirit. I see grace manifested through him, as well as love and forgiveness for his parents and all who has hurt him. This journey forced me to look at myself and my life. And today I know, that if it wasn’t for all the pain, I would never have met the King in His chamber and experience His love, daily. What great gift YHVH gave us as parents to have and take care of our children but, then the enemy comes and uses our brokenness to break our children. I think that this was one of my biggest challenges in life, not in the same way as Kilimanjaro, but me having to face the truth and effect of my unsorted DNA, my brokenness used by the enemy, to hurt my child. It forced me on my knees, humbly facing the truth – because only the truth sets us free. I have the ‘privilege’ that Wisdom speaks through Aldo’s pen. He gave me the full truth about my broken life and all that was in my DNA. The details of what Wisdom said often took my breath away because it was so entangled as part of me that I was totally unaware of it. I was so enveloped in darkness, but still confessed the light. That is what the harlot bride looks like.
I was angry and so frustrated today with our company that manage our website. As I lifted my voice, I could see Aldo staring at me. When I put the phone down he said to me” Mom, before you chose this path of light, you had an evil ranking called a ‘pig ranking ‘on you. That is what people carry in the spirit when they treat people bad. Do you really want to take that ranking back?”
Right there I went on my knees and ask for forgiveness, and for the rest of the day I was so confronted with this truth – that we cannot see the realm of the spirit. But is so, so real. And I DO NOT WANT THAT RANKING BACK EVER AGAIN IN MY LIFE. Please have mercy on me Abba!
This letter from Wisdom written through Aldo’s pen comes from our book ‘A message of hope’.
Aldo letter translation: What happened is that I went from hell to freedom. The battle for my life was hectic - the hell-workers told me they are going to kill me. They wanted to stop the work Jesus called me to do. Wisdom says they want to prevent God's children to be free. There is much power in hatred - they wanted to use racism to destroy me. Their fierce fire was severe. I had to hold on to Jesus. The truth is they hate God's children. My mother discovered the power of Blessing, also the power of repentance, blessings and forgiveness. The Blood of Jesus breaks the curses and sets us free. They had to flee when the blessings came upon them. Nehemia's walls are restored. Wisdom says hatred break the walls, you must also rebuild the walls. Satan fire us with fear and hatred. Today God is asking of each one of us to break the works of satan, to repent, to rebuild and to watch and pray. I am free through the blood of Jesus. Love Aldo
These truths forced me to rebuild the walls of our souls, and to get all the ‘dung’ out of our cities – our hearts. Aldo teaches me through Wisdom how the enemy needs covenant between people – through sex, hate, anger, double seed, compromise, and many other things. Satan uses these covenants as a channel to work through – an ideal opportunity created by us. To work through our brokenness is a process, and I have to tell you, one that we are still busy with. But, the good news is that we are truly starting to experience the fruits of healing, deliverance and freedom in many areas of our lives. But as I have learned today, it is a journey – one of dying to self and choosing the resurrection power of Christ in all circumstances in order to live a life of freedom. This is the only way to overcome the world and brokenness!
As part of this process, there were many days on my knees crying out to our Father – but not one of these was a waste of time. Here, I found His love, His grace, His guidance. Yes, I know today, that it was His love I needed - the baptism of fire – the baptism of love. You see, there is no fire like the fire of YHVH, the fire of everlasting love that consumed the sacrifice on Calvary. It is the baptism of love that we all need and in order to get it we need to get down on our faces before YHVH and seek Him. ‘Abba Father, please let your love from heaven flow down into my heart. I am giving up my life, all of me for this everlasting love.’
Without this love I can’t live in Him and can’t be a blessing to my children. As I was praying and starting to live that life – Aldo came up to me one day and said: ‘Mom, your double life was always an open portal for Satan over me, but now, as you chose the light and truth, wherever you walk there is an open portal from heaven. Through this portal YHVH’s love flows through you. Yeshua’s resurrection power and Wisdom can flow, because you are dead in self, and you have fought your evil DNA, and are now living a new life in Christ.’
This is working out your salvation with fear and trembling - it is a constant battle till the day Yeshua comes to fetch us. It is the love of YHVH that makes the difference. Love is the fire that will burn through every difficulty. Yeshua fills us with love as we empty ourselves from the evil of self and pride.
I realized today how easily I can open that evil portal again true “self”. Thank You for the Blood of Yeshua.
Do you know that the hardest and the most important work is the work of intercession, the work of going to YHVH and taking time to lay hold of Him for our children, families and ourselves. From this place of intercession I cried out to YHVH, after having made so many mistakes in life, just crying “please, please help me!”
I need the gift of an intercessory spirit, a spirit of prayer and supplication - a spirit of taking responsibility for my mistakes. I need to become an open portal for YHVH – all the time interceding and being active in the battle for the healing of my children and ourselves (building our walls). It was all done at Calvary - I cannot add anything. But, as a parent I need to be an empty and clean vessel that can intercede and pray for my children and our generations. “Help me Abba, that not one day will pass without me standing in that open portal, being totally dependent upon You alone - praying for our brokenness”.
Yeshua said “Retah, you must give yourself up to this love – the fruit of the Spirit is love. That will flow through you if you give up on “self”’.
We are all in this process, no one is perfect. Remember, nothing but love can conquer our selfishness, envy and pride. I look in Aldo’s eyes and see forgiveness. Even though he is still in so many battles with the enemy, he stands secure in Yeshua’s love. His battles are hard because he knows exactly who fights him, whom the enemy works through and I have to confess this – this was very difficult for me in the beginning. All of me wanted to phone you and ask you to take responsibility for your brokenness, because through your brokenness the enemy works, and you are hurting Aldo and many other. But, now I know that the battle is in the spirit and you are just an open portal for Satan if you choose to stay in darkness, and self. You are used by Satan because of your mixed seed and brokenness. We have the Blood of Yeshua, so we just need to become whole, rebuilding our walls - then your brokenness can no longer hurt and fight us. The sad thing is that so few people realize the true condition of their hearts, just because they choose to stay in denial. It was a shock again today for me to realize that we are recognisable in the spirit by our rankings of good or evil. Our mantles of light or darkness. This my friend will be a constant fight.
For me Retah, I thank Yeshua daily that I can take responsibility for the condition of my heart, that I can repent and close the evil portals over my family. This reality took me out of darkness into a very humble place of dependency on YHVH and His love.
Everything is possible for those who believe!
For Aldo’s birthday we asked him, ‘What do you want for your birthday?’ And as always he said ‘please just bless me, all of you, and then, please can we go to Cape Town?’ So here we are in Cape Town. Because of my operation I had to fly and could not drive all the way. We are resting, having a good time - enjoying each other and just celebrating life!
‘Thank you, Yeshua for second chances in life.’
Aldo lives a full, but broken life, if you look through the eyes of man, nothing seems perfect. As Aldo walks, he still falls over things. I look at him and see his difficulty. But I also see a thankful life. He fell very hard today and has a very deep head wound. His head is covered in thick bandage tonight. Josh looked at him and said “Aldo, me and mom and you will wear beanies tomorrow to town, no one will see your bandage!”. We make it fashion, is that ok with you? Everyone went for a run this morning - except Aldo and me. As we were staring after them Aldo said: ‘Mom, it is ok, bless them, you will run again’. I went to the bathroom and fell on my knees and cried and cried. Why is it that some days are just more difficult than others? Why did he need to fell so hard again? From my mother heart I could not answer him with the same guaranteed promise. I wiped my tears and went back, ‘Aldo, we know your race is a different race. You run the race of faith, you were send back - to run this race! He did not answer me, he just stared at me and smiled.
‘Thank you for the Blood of Yeshua, and thank you for life!!!! ‘ - a life that I don’t even know how to live – other than to just LOVE.
We will be back next week at the office, Josh in school and dad at work.
Love to you from Yzerfontein Cape Town
Retah and family.