Have you also felt discouraged after praying countless prayers for someone and it still seems as if they don’t hear you and there is no breakthrough? You call out to God saying, “Dear Lord Yeshua, why is it so difficult for them to see the truth? I know I was also blind once, but please remove the veil from their eyes and help them to see Your truth!”
Because of our human nature we tend to choose the easy way out most of the time. We all have to make decisions daily between following our fleshly desires (which is sin), or obedience to God. If we were to truly understand the repercussions of the Kingdom of darkness and all its wickedness, we would quickly turn our back on taking the easy way out and fulfilling the desires of the flesh. Yeshua had paid the price for all of us to be set free, and our obedience to Him should flow from our love relationship with Him.
“But even if our gospel is veiled, it is veiled to those who are perishing, whose minds the god of this age has blinded, who do not believe, lest the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God, should shine on them” (1 Cor. 4:3-4).
The Holy Spirit said to me, “Retah, every one of My children has to be rescued from the grip of darkness that tries to keep them in bondage to sin. Things like unforgiveness, hatred, bitterness, pride, envy and all the other fruits of wickedness are constant threats and temptations they face every day.”
“Why is the pull of darkness so strong, Lord?”
“Because once someone is drawn away by the deceitfulness of sin, the lies of Satan blind them and hold their minds captive. The plans that I – the Lord Jehovah – have for your lives are so great, and I believe in you! But Satan tries to keep you in bondage by making you believe the lies he tells you about yourself.
“Retah, you need to understand that it is not that they do not want to see the light – they are unable to see it. If a man is totally blind, do you become angry when he doesn’t notice you when you walk into a room? So why are you angry when someone is blinded by Satan’s lies and he doesn’t acknowledge the wonderful Glory Light of My grace through Yeshua?
“My children are blinded by their situations, by their pain, by their emotions, by what they see, by what they believe...
“I want all of My Children who once were blind, but now can see, to help those whose minds are blinded by the god of this age. Go and take My light to those who are blind and held in bondage by the enemy.”
“But how must we do it, Lord? They don’t want to hear or see, and they push us away.”
“Retah, you do realize who is keeping them in darkness right?”
“Yes Lord, I do.”
“And haven’t I given you the authority and power to bind the devil’s works? Go and bind the works that keep your family, friends, relatives and children’s minds from seeing My light and hearing My truth. Only then can you effectively start praying for that person. Pray and don’t stop praying.
“I am Lord over all. No disaster, or circumstance, or disappointment can change who I am or move Me from My throne. I am the sovereign God, and My Word has the highest authority. The blood of Yeshua has defeated the enemy – nothing can be added to, or taken away from that. That is the bottom line.”
Then I heard a loud voice saying in heaven, “Now salvation, and strength, and the kingdom of our God, and the power of His Christ have come, for the accuser of our brethren, who accused them before our God day and night, has been cast down. And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony, and they did not love their lives to the death(Rev. 12:10-11)
The devil’s desire is to steal away the Word of Yahweh in our hearts. The Lord’s destiny for our lives is written in our hearts (Eccl. 3:11), but the enemy’s plan is to bring confusion, hurt and doubt so that we won’t live in the fullness of what Yeshua paid on the cross. Maybe the lies he has been telling you are that you don’t have a future or destiny, or that you are not good enough for what Yahweh has called you for; or maybe he is sowing seeds of doubt about the promises God has given you. Many times he will try to convince you to bottle up your hurt and pain, hiding it behind a mask. He’ll whisper lies into your ears to make you feel ashamed of what you are feeling and that way he can isolate you and break you down even further.
Well, let me tell you today – that is exactly how he wants to destroy people. We have to bring all of our pain into Yahweh’s glory light so that the Lord can heal it. You don’t always have to go to a friend or a counsellor to do this. You can go to the Lord by yourself and there, in the privacy of your prayer closet, you can tell Yeshua everything – every detail of your hurt, your feelings, the depth of your disappointments and your heartache. Tell the Lord everything that you would have wanted to say to the person who hurt you. Or maybe you were the one who hurt someone else? Yeshua is always ready to listen and always ready to help. As you pour out your heart before the Lord, ask Him for wisdom so that you can resolve the issue and healing for all the broken hearts. And then you can share communion with the Lord.
“Now the parable is this: The seed is the word of God. Those by the wayside are the ones who hear; then the devil comes and takes away the word out of their hearts, lest they should believe and be saved. But the ones on the rock are those who, when they hear, receive the word with joy; and these have no root, who believe for a while and in time of temptation fall away. Now the ones that fell among thorns are those who, when they have heard, go out and are choked with cares, riches, and pleasures of life, and bring no fruit to maturity. But the ones that fell on the good ground are those who, having heard the word with a noble and good heart, keep it and bear fruit with patience (Luke 8:11-15).
There are three different roots of pain: unresolved issues, unmet needs and unhealed pain. Bring all of these hurts that might still be hiding in your heart to Yeshua. It will bring a sense of closure to unresolved conflict. Many times it is not possible to go to the person who hurt you (or whom you have hurt) to resolve the issues. If reconciliation is impossible at the moment, you have to deal with the pain in your heart before it forms a bitter root. Only Yeshua can truly heal us through His blood. With this I don’t mean that counsellors can’t help you – but my motto is that you should always seek Yeshua’s counsel first. From my own experiences I have found that our hearts and minds don’t receive complete healing and closure until everything that needs to be said has been said.
I will deliver you from the Jewish people, as well as from the Gentiles, to whom I now send you, to open their eyes, in order to turn them from darkness to light, and from the power of Satan to God, that they may receive forgiveness of sins and an inheritance among those who are sanctified by faith in Me (Acts 26:17-18).
When we bring our issues from the darkness to the light, our faces will be turned to the Light and healing will begin to take place.
I have been receiving a lot of e-mails asking why I am not putting any new letters of Aldo on the web at the moment. I know that people cannot even begin to imagine the degree of the spiritual battle Aldo’s has been fighting for his destiny. There have been so many nights that I have cried at the Lord's feet telling Him of my heartache and pain. The enemy is really trying everything he can do to stop Aldo from walking in his calling, and we are learning of many new ways that they are fighting him in the spirit. Out of ignorance so many people make negative comments or gossip about our situation, and the evil forces then use those words to strengthen the attack; because negative words are fiery darts.
In Psalm 57:4-5, David describes it this way: My soul is among lions; I lie among the sons of men who are set on fire, whose teeth are spears and arrows, and their tongue a sharp sword. Be exalted, O God, above the heavens; Let Your glory be above all the earth.
Like all of us, Aldo also needs to deal with his emotions and his pain in order to come to a place of wholeness. The problem is that he doesn’t talk much and this makes the healing process more difficult because he bottles up his emotions. If the emotions and the pain stay in the darkness it becomes a breeding place for the enemy.
But, at the end of the day we can still say: ALL IS WELL, ALL IS WELL, ALL IS WELL. The Lord keeps us standing. We have been through similar battles before, and this time I have learned that the enemy always uses people for his dirty work. It can be people very close to you, or people who don’t even know you but who judge you according to their ignorance of the reality of the realm of the spirit. They don’t understand the principles of the Kingdom of Yahweh and their judgements are based on what the eye can see and not the truth of God’s Word.
I bless these people, because I understand so well that they do not know what they are saying or doing. Not long ago there was also a time when I didn’t understand much about the spirit realm and the principles that govern it. I still don’t understand everything yet! But I am learning... and most of all, I am willing to learn. I am not afraid because I know that Yeshua has paid the price in full. It is all because of the blood of the Lamb that I am set free and delivered from all kinds of bondage.
Aldo also has a head injury that makes this battle even more real, because he is so sensitive. But what astounds me time and again is the purity of his letters – they come out of Yeshua’s heart. We have been thrown into the deep end, and by His grace we are swimming. The Lord downloads information into our hands every day – it is like receiving a battle plan for the warrior bride.
So, in the midst of this trial I can still say it is well with my soul. Is it difficult? Definitely. It is painful for a mom to see her child suffer, but I also know that what we are going through cannot compare to the glory that awaits us all.
I am not revealing what Yeshua is showing us at the moment, because I don’t think the time is right yet. I believe Yeshua is waiting for the battle to be over and done before He gives us the go ahead to share everything. We are standing firm in faith, believing that Yahweh will faithfully complete what He has started in Aldo’s life.
“Again I say to you that if two of you agree on earth concerning anything that they ask, it will be done for them by My Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered together in My name, I am there in the midst of them” (Matt. 18:19-20).
“Yeshua, there was a time when I thought I had given You my all. But as I now lay on my face night after night, I discover the subtle shades of gray in my heart. These grey areas have polluted my life this whole time – I just wasn’t always aware of it. The more time I spend with You, looking at my heart from Your point of view and washing it with the blood of the Lamb; the more I start seeing and understanding Your holiness.”
When you come to this place of brokenness, you will no longer be able to use “O, the Lord knows my heart,” as an excuse for sin. You will begin to understand that you don’t have it in yourself to live this holy life the Lord requires of you... it is only because of Him, and by His grace, that we can walk this road of purification!
For thus says the High and Lofty One who inhabits eternity, whose name is Holy: “I dwell in the high and holy place, with him who has a contrite and humble spirit, to revive the spirit of the humble, and to revive the heart of the contrite ones (Is. 57:15).
That is why we have to surrender everything to Him. Every emotion, all of our pain, every high and every low, should be securely in His hands. All that we need for this journey through life is in Him – it does not come from ourselves. In Him we will receive patience, perseverance, peace and strength. Let me say it again: everything we need to overcome is found in Him!
It is only when I am on my face before Him that I begin to understand the true meaning of holiness. When I then look at my own hands I can see by faith how I am clutching the “title deed” of my God-given destiny. Nobody can take it away from me – because I now know the authority of the Person who signed it.
Now faith is the assurance (the confirmation, the title deed) of the things [we] hope for, being the proof of things [we] do not see and the conviction of their reality [faith perceiving as real fact what is not revealed to the senses] (Heb. 11:1 Amp).
“Lord, as I take hold of you through my tears, I lay down more and more of ‘self’. I surrender my body, soul and spirit on Your altar, Yahweh. Take it all; break it all, until only You can be seen. Christ in me is my hope of glory. Lord, I pray that people will see You when they look at me. Only You! I am brave enough to say: Do what You need to do Lord, so that You will have all of me.... because You have given Your all for me!”
Someone asked me the other day, “How much more can you take, Retah? What is it that keeps you and Tinus standing?”
The cross of Calvary, friend. That is all I am clinging to. When Yeshua carried His cross up to Calvary I believe all He could think about were our names. He never once thought that ‘Retah isn’t worth it’. He knew of all my sin and shortcomings, and He still chose to die for me – the Guiltless for the guilty.
I can just imagine what went thought Yeshua’s mind as He was carrying His cross, “This is all for you My beloved. Everything you need is in Me. My love for My bride is what compels Me forward. Each step I take is for her. I will pay the full price, because she is worth it.”
The price Jesus paid for us doesn’t mean that we won’t ever get hurt, but it means we can face every storm with our Beloved.
I know that Josh is safely under Yahweh’s protection, and that Aldo is too – regardless of what he is going through. He is in the secret place of the Most High, even if the storms are raging around him.
He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the LORD, “He is my refuge and my fortress; My God, in Him I will trust” (Ps. 91:1-2).
I am ministering at another Spirit School in Paarl this week and I stayed at our little holiday house all by myself last weekend. It was a feast to spend some time alone with Holy Spirit! I prayed more than I ate, because when this mom is on her own and doesn’t have to feed her family she doesn’t cook at all.
Zozzie phoned me during the weekend. “Mom, is it nice by the sea? Are you going swimming?”
It is winter in South-Africa and the water is cold as ice! I laughed and answered my Zoz, “No Love, Mommy is not going swimming – I’m praying!”
“That’s fine, Mom. But go to the city and treat yourself a bit. Yeshua wants you to rest too. Aldo will be fine! We need to pray, trust, and then be patient. You should know that by now, Mom. Chans and I went to Pretoria this weekend, while Daddy and Aldo went to the farm. Aldo enjoys looking after his veggies so much, Mom. Don’t worry about him – he is safely in Yeshua’s hand. Don’t look at what you see, Mom. Everything will be all right.”
“Yes, I know Zozzie. I realize that life goes on, and I am so thankful that you live your life with passion! Never stop doing that. Don’t ever get pulled down by circumstances. Keep on focussing on Yeshua, and live life!”
What we are going though at the moment isn’t all bad. We are learning so many valuable lessons. We learn from our mistakes, we learn to be humble and merciful, to appreciate the sufferings of Yeshua, and to depend on Yahweh alone and not on ourselves. We are standing on this promise:
And the God of peace will crush Satan under your feet shortly. The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you. Amen (Rom. 16:20).
There are many people who are walking on similar roads as we are. Pain doesn’t have a formula. Heartache is heartache, no matter what form it comes in. While I was standing in a Christian bookshop I heard a woman asking the shop assistant, “Do you have book titled: ‘God in my brokenness’?” I looked at the woman while the clerk checked for the book on the computer system, and when I saw the same pain in her eyes that I often feel I thought to myself, “I know that pain”. Our pain is probably not remotely from the same source, but our searching for God in our pain is the same. (Photo: Mervis van der Merwe leading worship at the Paarl Spirit School.)
My prayer for you today is that you will keep on believing! Yeshua is never too late. Don’t become anxious – He is the answer! Let’s go and sit on our Daddy’s lap and tell Him of our heartache. Let’s give it to Him. The more we open up our hearts to Him, the more healing we can receive. It is a process, but I praise the Lord that we don’t have to face the battle alone.
Love from Cape Town!
Retah.